Today's film is "Carnival of Souls." More psychological, got one of those great twisty endings we all love. In fact, it's one of the films David Lynch cited as an inspiration for "Lost Highway."
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Nerduary Halloween Week Celebration: Day 2
For Tuesday's selection, it's "The Brain that Wouldn't Die" (1962).
subtitled: "Good luck with no fuckin' head."
subtitled: "Good luck with no fuckin' head."
Monday, October 29, 2007
Nerduary Halloween Week Celebration: Day 1
It's the week of Halloween, so to celebrate, I'm going to put up a *full* classic horror movie today through Friday, 'cause I love all of you so much.
Remember, if you look in a mirror and say "Jake is a cultural phenomenon" three times, you'll wake up with me over you in the middle of the night, asking if you have any ice cream and Magic Shell in the kitchen.
It's "The Last Man on Earth," starring Vincent Price. Written by Richard Matheson, based on his story "I Am Legend..." which is incidentally coming out soon starring Wil Smith.
And yes, the movie's public domain. We're not getting sued over this.
Remember, if you look in a mirror and say "Jake is a cultural phenomenon" three times, you'll wake up with me over you in the middle of the night, asking if you have any ice cream and Magic Shell in the kitchen.
It's "The Last Man on Earth," starring Vincent Price. Written by Richard Matheson, based on his story "I Am Legend..." which is incidentally coming out soon starring Wil Smith.
And yes, the movie's public domain. We're not getting sued over this.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Oh, You Dumb Bastard Robot...
You know what I love in comics? I love it when a villain is so all-powerful, so sure to win that they eventually get knocked down a peg or two via some dumb-yet-insanely clever way.
Take Ultron right now over in Mighty Avengers. Ultron, that evil robot created by founding Avenger Henry Pym is back and more powerful than ever. It’s not only managed to seemingly kill Iron Man/turn him into a hot, naked, robot doppleganger of The Wasp, but using Tony Stark’s armor, Ultron has managed to use the Avengers’ own futuristic technology against them. Power grids are shut down, The S.H.I.E.L.D. Helicarrier is disabled and dogs and cats are living together. Things look pretty bad for Earth’s Mightiest.
That is, until Henry "Ant-Man/Giant Man/Goliath/Yellow Jacket/Wife Beater" Pym starts to remember the 80’s fondly….
And it works! Well, almost. S.H.I.E.L.D. manages to get powered up again, Ultron is kind of surprised and The Avengers get a little extra time to figure out how to kill that batshit crazy robot and play a little Pitfall. The day isn’t saved, but things are at least moving forward.
Of course, this would never happen in real life. In real life, evil androids bent on wiping out humanity don’t bullshit around. They just nuke everything. If you're lucky, before the nuclear holocaust begins, a message may pop up on your computer monitor telling you how humanity has become obsolete and that the time of the machines is at hand. Maybe. But where’s the fun in that? In real life, a Commodore 64 never saved the day, but it would be nice if it did.
So thank you comic books for giving us what we want. Thank you comic books for letting ultimate evil be toppled by obsolete video game systems!
Take Ultron right now over in Mighty Avengers. Ultron, that evil robot created by founding Avenger Henry Pym is back and more powerful than ever. It’s not only managed to seemingly kill Iron Man/turn him into a hot, naked, robot doppleganger of The Wasp, but using Tony Stark’s armor, Ultron has managed to use the Avengers’ own futuristic technology against them. Power grids are shut down, The S.H.I.E.L.D. Helicarrier is disabled and dogs and cats are living together. Things look pretty bad for Earth’s Mightiest.
That is, until Henry "Ant-Man/Giant Man/Goliath/Yellow Jacket/Wife Beater" Pym starts to remember the 80’s fondly….
And it works! Well, almost. S.H.I.E.L.D. manages to get powered up again, Ultron is kind of surprised and The Avengers get a little extra time to figure out how to kill that batshit crazy robot and play a little Pitfall. The day isn’t saved, but things are at least moving forward.
Of course, this would never happen in real life. In real life, evil androids bent on wiping out humanity don’t bullshit around. They just nuke everything. If you're lucky, before the nuclear holocaust begins, a message may pop up on your computer monitor telling you how humanity has become obsolete and that the time of the machines is at hand. Maybe. But where’s the fun in that? In real life, a Commodore 64 never saved the day, but it would be nice if it did.
So thank you comic books for giving us what we want. Thank you comic books for letting ultimate evil be toppled by obsolete video game systems!
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Superman really is a dick!
If you are bored, you could spend a few hours over at Superdickery.It showcases a collection of classic comic book covers as evidence that Superman is a dick. Here's one of my favorites.
Definitely worth checking out.
Definitely worth checking out.
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Das Boot- Ya Know... For Kids!
This is an actual ad that appeared in comic books back in the 1960's:
“How proud you will be as commander of your own Polaris Sub- the most powerful weapon in the world!” You don’t get ads like this anymore and you sure as hell don’t get many doomsday devices marketed towards CHILDREN. By the time I came around, people were starting to get pissed that you could get a cap gun that looked exactly like a real hand cannon*. No one ever offered me my own nuclear submarine for just under seven bucks.
You have to wonder how many of these things were moved. You also have to wonder how many rich little bastards had daddy fork over a couple hundred dollars so they could have their own silent fleets. Arms races springing up all over the country in little suburbs between first graders, all of them facing off at the local lake, daring the other to be the first to strike, all ready to implement a scorched earth policy.
I even have this sickly wonderful image of Wally and the Beav turning a pair of keys at the exact same moment and dumping their nuclear payload onto that annoying asshole Eddie Haskell’s house.
I do want one though, so I'm going to send in $6.98 and that order form and see what happens.
* To be fair, a few stupid kids were ruining it for the rest of us by scaring the shit of cops with their realistic toy guns and getting shot. So, you know, there was that.
“How proud you will be as commander of your own Polaris Sub- the most powerful weapon in the world!” You don’t get ads like this anymore and you sure as hell don’t get many doomsday devices marketed towards CHILDREN. By the time I came around, people were starting to get pissed that you could get a cap gun that looked exactly like a real hand cannon*. No one ever offered me my own nuclear submarine for just under seven bucks.
You have to wonder how many of these things were moved. You also have to wonder how many rich little bastards had daddy fork over a couple hundred dollars so they could have their own silent fleets. Arms races springing up all over the country in little suburbs between first graders, all of them facing off at the local lake, daring the other to be the first to strike, all ready to implement a scorched earth policy.
I even have this sickly wonderful image of Wally and the Beav turning a pair of keys at the exact same moment and dumping their nuclear payload onto that annoying asshole Eddie Haskell’s house.
I do want one though, so I'm going to send in $6.98 and that order form and see what happens.
* To be fair, a few stupid kids were ruining it for the rest of us by scaring the shit of cops with their realistic toy guns and getting shot. So, you know, there was that.
Friday, October 05, 2007
Okay, fine then.
If no one else is going to post, I'm just going to put up a picture of myself naked.
Well, partially naked. I know that Turner and Derek got all excited for a minute there.
Well, partially naked. I know that Turner and Derek got all excited for a minute there.
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