I picked this up at a thing I had to do for work today. I looked at the cover and just laughed, but then stopped and said “Hey… haven’t I read this before?”
Yeah, turns out I had. This one was actually an updated version of a much older issue with basically the same story, characters and everything; but just newer artwork.
They maybe couldn’t have updated this with a new group of heroes? What kid today wouldn’t want to see Moon Knight beating the ever-living dog shit out of this 2 bit jack ass? Or maybe having The Punisher blow him away and then deliver an uplifting moral of “Smoke, and I’ll smoke you!” Or at least add a little levity at the end with Wolverine smokin’ a stogey on the last page and getting caught by the others only to respond with “What? Not like I gotta worry about cancer. Sucks to be you.”
But I guess they think that these “timeless” tales of triumph of the human spirit, or whatever the hell they are, still work. They work all right. They work as good rolling papers when those junkie kids run out of their regular ones.
I implore you Marvel and The American Cancer Society, please inject your PSA propaganda comics with something that’ll really scare those damned kids straight. I’m tellin’ you, give a ten year old a copy that shows The Punisher hunting down and murdering kids that smoke; and that kid will cry his brains out every time he even hears the word cigarette again.
Problem solved. Through comics no less.
D
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