Watch this

It would be pretentious of me to say that I don’t like watching TV or that I don’t watch TV at all. That would be bullshit and rest assured, anyone who says either of these things about themselves is a liar.

No, there are a few shows that I plan my evenings by. My Name is Earl is the new show this season that I look forward to, and I’ve grown to look forward to The Office. South Park is still must see and despite losing some of its steam, Lost is still the best drama on TV.

I also know that there are a hand full of good programs that I don’t watch. Some shows, like those that run on HBO, I don’t have access to, while others I just forget to watch. I just got into Arrested Development, but only on DVD. I’ve never watched it first run (which may be one reason it’s getting canceled).

There’s a lot of TV out there, especially with cable networks producing so much, and I’m just one man. Besides, I like to limit the amount of TV that I watch or else I feel lazier than I actually am. I don’t want to become one of those drones who can’t have a life more than six feet away from the screen.

Because there’s so much out there, I think, every year really good TV shows get canceled. Someone’s favorite show isn’t really being watched, or maybe the suits just decide it’s time to pull the plug. Whatever the reason, it happens a lot, and whenever it does, people take it personally (I’m just as guilty as I bitched and moaned when the WB decided to drop the ax on Angel).

However, magazines like Entertainment Weekly like to make us feel guilty for not watching more TV. They’re well intentioned true, but every few issues, we get lists of the “10 Best Shows You’re Not Watching,” and they’re designed to make us question why we aren’t supporting quality entertainment. Encouraging people not to watch crap is one thing. Hell, I do it all the time, yet the rebel inside me automatically kicks into high gear whenever I’m told what I have to watch. I get this paranoid feeling that the writer of the article is talking directly to me, calling me out in front of the country.

“What’s wrong with you, Chris? Can’t stomach to watch a good show? Civilization is crumbling and it’s all your fault!”

So I give the magazine a big “fuck you” and slam the magazine into the dining room basket, where all periodicals in my home go to wait for death. Like I said though, I understand the plea of help for quality television so I try not to get too upset. But what bothers me is when I stand back and look at the big picture.

As much as I love a good television program, that’s all it is: A television problem. Angel was one of my favorite shows ever, but my life didn’t change for the worse once it was gone. Arrested Development may be the most innovative sitcom since Seinfeld, but it doesn’t really do anything to improve the general human condition. Politics is still corrupt, people in the Middle East are dying needlessly, and gas prices are still driving me into poverty. One less show on TV ain’t gonna change my life. I may get 30 minutes to an hour of joy from it, but Hell, I can always replace it with something else. Other TV shows, a book, comics, a board game, sex, you name it.

Sometimes I think I’m better off when a show goes away. I really do. When Angel went away, I didn’t replace it with anything, so there was one less hour I spent glued to the TV. When Alias goes away next year, there’s another hour I’m not chained to the TV. I honestly would dance in the streets naked if Firefly got to come back. But deep down, I like not being beholden to the TV.

Remember what I said though. I talk big now, but as soon as some shiny new show comes along, I’ll be giving up more social time in favor of passive viewing, and most likely telling other about shows “they have to watch.” What can I say? I’m part of the problem.

The book was better...

Constantine. Fantastic Four. Batman and Robin. League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.

As a comic book fan who has felt more than a little slighted over the years thanks to really shoddy movie translations, I can somewhat understand why Harry Potter purists are so up in arms over the last two installments in the film series. The last two directors have opted to cut out what some say are “vital” scenes from the movies, and the integrity, fans claim, has been hurt. However, and I don’t mean to sound offensive when I say this, as I walked out of the theater after seeing Goblet of Fire and hearing some of the off the wall complaints some people had about the movie on the way out, I really don’t think some people completely understand the difference between what makes a good book, and what makes a good movie. While the stories may be the same, each medium has it’s own set of requirements, and often times those requirements are in conflict with each other.

Going back to the comic book movie analogy, most of us would agree which comic films have been the best. Superman I and II. X-2. Spider-Man and Spider-Man 2. None of these movies are one hundred percent faithful to the source material, though. Superman can make Lois Lane forgetful with but a kiss, Spider-Man’s origins were heavily tweaked and a good bit of the X-Men’s histories and relationships were mixed and matched for the sake of a good story not to mention that their traditional costumes were completely scrapped. Still, these movies are held as the pinnacles for making comics into movies.

But why? Because while they strayed from the source material, they kept the spirit of their inspirations alive. It felt like Superman. It felt like Spider-Man and the X-Men. Audiences, and by that I mean comic geeks, were willing to forgive small omissions and transgressions because the film makers obviously knew what they were doing and how the story needed to be told best. That’s not to say some geeks weren’t pissed. I stopped in at more than a couple comic shops where Sam Raimi was being lambasted for making Mary Jane Peter’s first girlfriend over Gwen Stacy. The uber-geeks, though, don’t understand that a two hour movie can in no way capture between 40 and 75 years of history. The rest of us saw a job well done and a respect for the characters and enjoyed the movie.

So why can’t Harry Potter fans do this? Critics and most fans openly acknowledge that the last two movies were by far the best. Chris Columbus got the ball rolling, but he was faithful to the books to a flaw. The movies were slow moving, and badly paced to the point of being almost excruciating to watch, whereas in Prisoner of Azkaban and Goblet of Fire, we got movies that trimmed the fat. The directors cut out the things that would kill the pacing of the movies and focused on the meat and potatoes of the books. After three movies, did we really need another play by play Quidditch match? Did we need to see just how fantastic the wizarding world was, as if we hadn’t already visited it a few times before? In fact, even Harry is starting to become a little desensitized to the world of wizarding. J.K. Rowling is focusing less on the wonders and more on the characters. Just reread the latest novel. Fans now get that this world is unlike ours. Let’s move along now.

It needs to be understood why the movies have strayed a little lately. For starters, books are personal experiences. You read a book alone. You curl up on the bed, or on the sofa and while away the hours. The author is allowed to delve off into more sub plots and side adventures. We expect books to be this way and feel slighted when they aren’t. A movie is a group experience and not only that, it’s someone else’s vision. Sure, we all take in our own ideas of what Hogwarts needs to look like, or how spooky the hedge maze is, but once the opening credits roll, we are now passively taking in the information. When reading a book, we’re expected to visualize everything on our own no matter how eloquent a writer may be.

Not to mention the basic difference in the mediums. Books exist solely in the language of the text, while a movie is made expresly for visual stimulation. When leaping from the page to the screen, Concessions have to be made and compromises sought out. Some things that work in a book will never work on film. They just won’t.

Movies are also really expensive. If every paragraph of every page is faithfully transcribed on film, we would wind up with a movie that lasted for days.

It’s time Harry Potter fans realized that the movies are not the books. They may share the same name, they may share the same characters, plots, and settings, but the’re totally independent of one another from there. The last two directors seemed to have realized this, as well as the majority of fans. It’s a disservice to yourself to get bogged down in trying to figure out why this scene was cut, or why this character was left out. The book may have given us an entire chapter showing just how bad ass Krum is, but the movie did just fine showing the crowd’s reaction to him as he zipped by on his broom. It got the same message across, and besides, the world Cup was only a set up for the return of the Death Eaters.

So unless the next director takes the Constantine route or, worse, the Batman and Robin route, the movies are going to be just fine. The books are still there, so just let the movies enhance what you already love.

Oh, Mr. Miyagi...

This makes me sadder than I ever thought it would. Kind of like another piece of my childhood died.

Pikachu's happy meal!

Yesterday, along with some friends, I ventured into New York City to look at the Balloons being inflated for the Macy's Day Parade. By the time we got to were the balloons were, they were all inflated and straped down. I felt a little joy seeing a huge Barney tied down under a net. But then I was exsposed to something most unexpected. I mean, Ronald McDonald already looks like a child molestor or something, but this-- I have no words.

I overheard some random observer say, “Now that’s a happy meal!”
*************************************************************
I was informed that I got the quote wrong, it was really "That's one hell of a happy meal Pikachu's having!"

“He believes he'd have suffered less if he'd ‘sodomised and murdered a busload of children after giving them heroin.’”

I was at the movie theater this weekend and I saw a new poster for V for Vendetta, the movie based on the graphic novel by Alan Moore. I had to go watch the trailer again. It looks pretty damn cool. “People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people.” I have the original graphic novel, but it has been quite a while since I read it (years), and to be honest, I didn’t get it when I originally read it (lots of years). So now I want to re-read it, thinking maybe I’ll understand it better now (although, who knows, I still won’t brave From Hell, its too dense).

I was looking for news of the movie and Alan Moore and it seems he’s not too happy with the script for Vendetta. The script is written by the Wachowski brothers and I have to save I’ve quite enjoyed all their movies (Bound and the Matrix trilogy) and I’ve been looking forward to the movie ever since I heard about it. Alan Moore on the other hand is not looking forward to this movie or any movie adaptations of his work. Here’s how he feels about the movie projects.

"If I owned the sole copyright, like with 'Voice Of The Fire,' there would not be a film. Anything else, where others owned copyrights, I'd insist on taking my name off future films. All of the money due to me would go to the artists involved. I'd divorce myself from the film process, the film industry and any adaptations. And I felt a sense of moral satisfaction… When Karen Berger rang me up to give me money for the 'Constantine' movie, I asked her to take my name off the film and split the money with the artists… The same with the option money on 'V For Vendetta.' I think it was about eight grand. It went to David Lloyd. Now, I wasn't doing this because I could afford it, I was short of change actually, but I just wanted it done. Give it to Dave, take my name off the film."

To add insult to injury, after all this, Joel Silver said in a press release that Alan Moore “was very excited about what Larry had to say and Larry sent the script, so we hope to see him sometime before we're in the UK. We'd just like him to know what we're doing and to be involved in what we're trying to do together."

That really pissed Alan Moore off. I’ve got to say I’m pretty impressed that someone who is “short of change” is turning down lots of money because he doesn’t agree with the adaptations. I don’t know if I could do that. I mean, this is a lot of money.

He’s just had nothing but bad luck with movies. He was included when 20th century fox was sued over the similarities between League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and a screenplay called “Cast of Characters.”

"They seemed to believe that the head of 20th Century Fox called me up and persuaded me to steal this screenplay, turning it into a comic book which they could then adapt back into a movie, to camouflage petty larceny.”

“He believes he'd have suffered less if he'd ‘sodomised and murdered a busload of children after giving them heroin.’”

On a separate note, Time Magazine recently published a list of 100 Best Novels published since 1923 to the present and Alan Moore’s Watchmen made the list and is currently ranked number two according to readers. Time magazine also did a five page feature about the history of the Watchmen. Watchmen is another project (like V for Vendetta) that DC comics has the rights to. Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons underestimated their work. They will get the rights to Watchmen once it goes out of print, which has not happened in the twenty years since it was published.

But back to V for Vendetta. AiCN reviewed the script for Vendetta and blasted it saying “If I had given birth to a flawed masterpiece such as V for Vendetta in the first place, there would be no way in hell I'd want this mutilated fetus in exchange for it splayed out on the screen for everyone to watch."

And then Joe Michael Straczynski, who had also read the script, blasted the reviewer saying Understand: I work with Marvel, I have no vested interest in defending DC or Alan or anyone or anything else.

"The anonymous individual who sent AiCN his 'review' has his head well and duly up his butt. That he had a copy of the script is obvious; that he understood it, less so. There's an old saying: a book is like a mirror, if an ass peers in, you can't expect an apostle to peer out. This person clearly has no idea what's actually going on in that script despite having read it (or having it read to him). You can take anything -- ANYthing -- and by casting it in a certain light, make it sound stupid. 'Oh, and at the end of Blade Runner, there's this REALLY stupid scene where the android guy's, like, hugging a pigeon and talking about moons on fire.' It's all in how you phrase it. Making fun of something is easy.

"About a month ago, I got hold of the V script, the very same draft that this anonymous assassin cites. As a fan of Alan's work, and the V books in particular, I sat down, eager to read it.

"What I read blew my brains out through the back of my head.

"I think it's one of the smartest, sharpest, insightful and well-crafted scripts I've ever read. It's emotional, evocative, heart-rending, biting, sharp, relentless and just plain garden variety powerful. It's not just a good film, it's an *important* film, and there's a great deal of subtlety and nuance in it that was clearly lost on the idiot that read the script so he could make fun of it and stir the pot.”

So now I’m looking forward to the movie, but it sucks that Alan Moore is so unhappy with it. I would like to support him, but I really want to see the movie. I’ll support him by buying his new book when it comes out. And I’ll go see this movie cuz Natalie Portman’s hot.

I got all this info from various articles and their links at http://www.alanmoorefansite.com

Nifty Nerduary Showdown #7

I appologize to everyone on not posting this sooner. I might only get one showdown this week since I only posted one last week. But, I will try.

As expected, the Decepticons are still scraping dead Joes off of their boots after the disasterous attack by G.I. Joe and the entire squad.

Anyway, I will try to post another sometime this week.

I promise the Nifty Nerduary Showdown will return in full force next week.

Harry Potter 4 "The Goblet of Fire"

So, I went to see this movie Friday. I was not a big fan of the third movie, although I am a big fan of the books. I was hoping for a return to the Chris Columbus style in which the movie followed the book as closely as possible. I was disappointed in this matter. However, I will not complain too much. The movie definately hit most if not all of the high points, although some were changed either for convenience or whatever. One element of this movie that truely warmed my heart was a significant showing of my two favorite characters, Fred and George Weasly. These two are the funniest characters in the books, and getting a little sappy, they remind me of my best friend (he is a bit of a mischief maker). There are a lot of nit-picky details that I noticed or that bothered me, but I don't think most of them took away from the story. The biggest and most serious complaint I have about the movie, however, is that the entire movie seems rushed (except for the First Challenge, which seemed a bit drawn out). I am not sure how well a non-reader will understand what is going on in the movie, or at least some of the undercurrents. All in all I liked this movie better than the third, but the first and second movies are still better (even though the books continuously improve). I hope J.K. Rowlings will step in with the fifth movie, and give the screen writers less creative licence.

Goosebumps...

Ok, now I'm a little skeptical of Superman Returns. And I take issue with a few of the things that have been tweaked in the movie (from what I've seen and heard).

BUT, it's Brian Singer. I thought the same things about X-Men 1 & 2 when they were coming out. And look how good they were (minor annoyances aside). So I place my trust in him to get the job done. I think that if anyone can pull off another good Superman movie and return him to where he rightfully belongs, it's Singer.

http://supermanreturns.warnerbros.com/trailer.html

It's short, but effective. I just can't wait for the actual trailer. So I guess the teaser did it's job.

Aw, man. And I thought calling Walker: Texas Ranger "Super Truck" was good...

So I completely fucking stole this from Chris, but I had to put it on here.

I just had someone from work come into my office to check on me to make sure I was all right because I was laughing so hard I was crying. And snorting.

http://www.4q.cc/chuck/index.php?topthirty

Oh Jesus Christ, Steve. This shit is just too funny. If you can't laugh at Chuck Norris, then you are severely deficient.

D

Look! Up in the sky!

Superman is back, baby!

Back in the day, the Superman’s writers and editors were all about making the Man of Steel as out there as possible. Month in and month out, year after year, readers were guaranteed to see things in the Superman books that they couldn’t get anywhere else. Superman comics were truly a mix of everything that made the science fiction pulp mags of the ‘20s and ‘30s rock with all the super hero trimmings, and a little bit of soap opera for good measure.

Giant, killer robots. Space tyrants. Miniature cities. Evil geniuses. Twisted dopplegangers. Alternate universes. Giant monkeys. Time travel. Space adventures. Lost civilizations and much, much more.

Superman never left the limelight, but over the years, the Man of Tomorrow sure got kind of boring.

Wednesday, things got back on the right track with Grant Morrison and Frank Quitely’s new comic “All Star Superman.”


“All Star Superman” is the Superman comic we’ve all been waiting for. It has all the sensibilities of modern story telling (thank God), but Morrison is pulling in everything that made comics cool and trippy in the Silver Age. Everything seems big and dangerous yet awe-inspiring and wondrous at the same time.

In the first issue alone, Superman fights a genetically enhanced suicide bomber above the sun, finds out that he may be dying from absorbing to much solar energy, gains a new power, hangs with a scientist on Venus who is making a new race of genetically altered human beings to benefit mankind, and Lex Luthor goes from being a reformed villain working for the government to renewing his quest to kill Superman all because he realizes that he’s aging and Superman is not.

“So, if I want to die happy, it’s time to get serious about killed Superman. Don’t you think?”

This is what Superman should be. An insanely powerful guy haveing insane adventures that you can’t see anywhere else.

“All Star Superman” is designed for both longtime fans of Superman and folks who’ve never really picked up a comic. It’s Superman boiled down to the essentials, the Superman that for years has only existed in our fantasies. It’s a fresh start so anyone can jump and be wowed by a great story and stunning art.

Nifty Nerduary Showdown #7

I appologize to you guys, but this one has to be quick.

Cobra Commander is at it again. Seems he's found a new mercenary squad. The entire G.I. Joe squad with all of their equipment (yes--ALL) and personnel available is on their way to a mysterious deserted island in the Pacific.

Awaiting them is Cobra Commander's surprise: The Decepticons.

Let the showdown begin.








Voting ends next Tuesday morning.

Nifty Nerduary Showdown Wrap #5

Chewie's heart is broken. Han never came back to the Falcon. If it hadn't been for the repairs, Chewie would have been with him. Now, Han, his best friend and owner ... eh? Nevermind. Han is dead and he's never coming back.

Wait, the Falcon is now his by default.

Happy in the realization that the life debt was always a crappy tradition, Chewie takes off in the Falcon and leaves the planet.








Meanwhile, Mal goes on a tear and drinks in celebration of his victory.








At one point in the night, he's seen wearing interesting clothing.







Later, he awakens ... with no clothes at all.







Bottom line, Mal defeats Han easily.

We're all kind of like "The Radicals"

This is more of a personal thing than a "geek" thing really, but I don't give a damn.

Watching Raw last night was hard. If you didn't see it, they did a tribute show to Eddie Guerrero. "Emotional" is the word that I would use to describe it. You can't really say "sad" becuase they did their best to pay tribute to Eddie, not to memorialize him. So they wanted to do what he would have wanted to do: put on a show. 'Cause that's what he loved to do the most.

Inbetween matches they put in little vignettes to remember some of his best highlights, like winnig the WWE Championship (his greatest wrestling achievement). But it was the personal interviews that made the show. Those who knew Eddie the best, or even those who just wanted to say how he affected them, were given time to tell everyone at home what they were thinking. Some were very, VERY hard to watch. Rey Mysterio and Chris Benoit come to mind. Probably two of Eddie's closest friends bared their hearts and souls to us.

And it's what I took away from watching those that I really want to make a note of. We all have friends. Some are closer than others. I stopped having a best friend when I was like 8. Now I have several friends who are like brothers (and sisters) to me. And to me, having a "brother" is better than having a "best friend". I just wanted to take a minute to let all of you out there know, just how much you all mean to me. Every now and then something happens that makes you take a second look at what you're doing and who you have around you. And when you pull back from yourself, you realize what you have and how important it all is to you. The most important of all, of course, is family and friends.

We don't ever do this enough, and unfortunately it's usually something bad that happens that pushes us to do it, but take a minute to let your friends know how important they are to you. Put up with the hassle for a few minutes to send a short email or something (or a post online). It'll make you feel better.

I love you all guys; and always remember that when you need me, I'll be there for you.

D

Oh, Uncle Eddie...

Eddie Guerrero died yesterday. 38-years-old and found dead with his toothbrush in his mouth in a hotel room, probably from heart failure.

As a lifelong wrestling fan, this is pretty shocking news, but at the same time, just another example of how wrestlers are dying way to young. While there is no cause of death yet, smart money is on drug abuse.

Eddie Guerrero, I think, was one of every wrestling fans' favorites. A great performer and an easy guy to get behind whether he was a face or a heel, there are way too many high points of his career to name here. The guy just rocked.

Nifty Nerduary Showdown #6

The second showdown of the week.

***

Jedi Knight Luke Skywalker entered the ancient temple. It was said Emperor Palpatine hid his most protected secrets inside this ancient tomb. During the Rebellion, the temple had been forgotten. Palpatine, in his arrogance, figured he would not need any of this. He believed his Empire would stand the test of time no matter what technological advances he possessed. Luke had found the information on the temple in a long forgotten file in the temple on Coruscant.

With Leia, Han and Chewie off saving the galaxy once again, Luke thought he could spare some time to check this out on his own. Besides, if history served, Luke would return at exactly the right time to save everyone's ass. Hell, he was a Jedi. His timing was always perfect, right?

The temple smelled of dust and dampness. He walked through the maze of tunnels for hours before reaching a fork in the path. Then, something in the Force told him to take a right. He entered into a softly lit room that suddenly exploded with light as he entered, the hum of machinery coming to life. Lining the wall were dozens of cylinders. Luke swallowed. He recognized these cylinders.

One opened.

Luke rested his hand on the lightsaber. His eyes adjusted to the figure inside the cylinder.

No, it couldn't be.

With a sudden motion, Anakin Skywalker in his prime, or what Luke believed to be his father's clone, leapt out of the cylinder, lightsaber drawn.




Luke ignited his lightsaber and stepped back as the youthful Anakin, the father he never knew, stood before him ready to strike.


***

Okay, Luke Skywalker in his prime as a Jedi versus Anakin in his prime as a Jedi. Let's say this clone of Anakin was taken and created during the Episode Three time frame. For Luke, this is right after Return of the Jedi when he was a full Jedi. In other words, both are full Jedis.

There is no one else on the planet. There are no Kyber Crystals or anything like that. Both have lightsabers and their Force powers. Let the showdown begin.

Voting will end sometime next Thursday morning.

Misery loves company

If someone said that the world could be perfect, that all it would take would be the utter annihilation of reality and my possible death followed by an immediate reboot of reality and my resurrection, then, yeah, I'd sign up for that.

Unless, of course, I was a super hero.

For whatever reason, the super hero community is violently opposed to a perfect world. They talk a big game, but they don't mean it. They want all of us to be miserable and unhappy. Deep down they want their dead friends to stay dead and they want to wallow in their misery and depression.

It's called the Zero Hour Effect.

When Hal Jordan tried to destroy the universe with the promise of rebooting it better than before, and even proved that, yes, he could do it, every costumed do-gooder roaming DC jumped to stop him. Green Arrow even popped a cap in him.

Their explanation? It's not right to play God.

Bullshit. Playing God is one thing, but Hal wasn't fucking around. He was ser-ee-ous. He was going to make everyone happy, and that was final. Anything you wanted, ol' Hal was going to make happen. Want to be Batgirl? Fine, you're Batgirl. Want a vagina and a penis? Okay, not my thing, but go for it. Hal was in a giving mood. He was a cosmic Santa Clause with an endless bag of goodies powered by Oan magic and left over Crisis energy.

Of course, the super hero community, who say they are for making a better world screwed it up for everyone, and everyone in the DC universe was left with a shitty world. Did anyone stop to ask Joe-Q-DC what he wanted? Nope. They made the call to keep life miserable for everyone else.

This isn't a problem exclusive to DC, either. Marvel did it just last week. Quicksilver and the Scarlet Witch made a new reality that, while not 100% perfect, was pretty damned close. But the Avengers and the X-men showed up and demanded that their crappy reality be restored.

And what happened? A few million mutants got screwed over and all the heroes went to bed happy that they got to keep the little guy down.

So yeah, when the time comes for me to decide whether to let the cosmic villain win or not (because face it, each of us is faced with this at least twice in our lives), and it's not Thanos or Darkseid, I’m going to let him run with it. Because whatever new reality he has in store for me has got to beat the one I’m in now.

Online Gamer Beggers

I am fairly active on a particular online RPG titled "Guild Wars". I have several different characters that I play, one that is high level, and pretty stinkin' tough. Now that the preface is taken care of...


I've seen other people ask for hand-outs before, but I always thought it was a bit of a joke. Well apparently bums, beggers, pan-handlers, or what-ever you call them, are everywhere. Now I try to not give people, I don't know, money. If you are really in need, I don't mind helping, but I'm not just going to give you cash. I may give buy you a sandwich, or something like that, but no cash.

Anyway, back to topic, is it wrong of me to be seriously pissed off by online beggers? I mean it isn't even real money. Are these people just being lazy, or are they trying to take advantage of me? It's a damn GAME for Bob's sake!! I just a little confused by the politics, and whole on-line situation.

Anyway, in general the people I've encountered playing Guild Wars are really nice, and helpful. I try to be helpful. Hell, I feel that the more people that are involved with something like Guild Wars the better, but why beg for money, or for that matter why try to take advantage of people, when you don't even get anything REAL?


Sorry for the venting, but I'm just a little confused by the whole thing. If anyone can shed some light on this subject for me I'd appreciate it.

If you are playing Guild Wars hollar at me, my character's name is Chubs McFun. My guild is Chicken or Beef.

Nifty Nerduary Showdown #5

Been a little slack this week. So I thought I should break out the showdown I've been waiting to see who'll win.

---

The bar was dark. A few lights flickered, the music softly played from a strange band he had never seen.

Mal left the crew on Serenity for this trip. It was a planet they had never been to-not many had. It was far beyond wild space, far beyond Reaver territory. The package he had come to retrieve had better be worth it ...



There's his contact. A short, bald man wearing a red robe approached him. Mal sighed, glad to be one step closer to leaving this hell hole. Greetings were exchanged and Mal reached to take the package from the contact.

"Hold it," a deep voice cut across the bar. Patrons slowly turned their heads, then scattered.

Mal turned to see a man facing him wearing a black vest over a dirty white shirt, pistol in a quick draw holster at his side.

"It's never easy," Mal thought.

***

Han Solo stared down the stranger across the bar, the stranger prepared to take what was his cargo in the first place. It wasn't going to happen. Jabba needed this package. If he didn't get it, he'd be watching his back for Boba Fett once again.

"Just let go of the package," Han said with a lopsided grin, "and walk away."



Han could tell this man had no intention of walking away. Too bad Chewie was still on the Falcon making repairs.

"Nothing's easy," Han thought.

***

There we have it. Firefly's Mal vs. Star Wars' Han. They are squaring off in a bar with most patrons far out of reach. Just to be safe, there are no Jedis, stormtroopers, Alliance troops, Blue Sun operatives, bounty hunters, Sith, telepaths or any other person other than normal, boring bar patrons within 100 miles of this space port. The Falcon and Serenity are also parked several blocks away from this bar. And, wouldn't you know it? Something in the air is jamming all communications (radios, comlinks, cellphones) within the entire city. How very strange ...

Okay, I think I cleared all the possible "what ifs."

Voting will continue till next Tuesday at around 8 a.m. or so.

SPAM SPAM SPAM

Nutritious and Delicious.






For those on a health kick try...






My favorite way to prepare SPAM, grilled.

Who's a Nerd?

The Nerduary, for all things nerdy. This blog is a sanctuary for all the nerds out there. The question is who is a nerd? Am I a nerd? Well I like Star Wars, Star Trek, video games, comics, and certain cult TV shows. Does this make me a nerd? When I was in High School I played football, and pole-vaulted. I played rugby in college, I was in a frat for 3 semesters, hell I still play rugby occasionally. According to pop-culture movies I'm a jock, and therefore am not a nerd. Am I an inigma?


Well one thing is for sure these guys are nerds!







Are Jango and Boba Fett nerds? I say 'Hell no!' They are bad-ass bouty hunters. Now the guy who built a Jango Fett suit in his mom's basement is a nerd, but he's got a girl on his arm.


Are all people who dress up as characters from 'nerdy' movies a nerd? Can hot chicks be nerds? Well if so I wanna get into this nerdy storm troopers armor.


I'm going to leave my opinion out of this post for now, but I ask you what makes someone a nerd? Once a nerd, always a nerd? Is being a nerd a bad thing? Can the 'beautiful people' be nerds? Am I a nerd?

Nerduary Wrap #3 and #4

Showdown wrap from last week.

Wrap #3

The Buffy vs. Lara Croft fight was over before it started. Lara pulled out a knife and Buffy destroyed her before Croft knew what happened.

Outcome: Buffy doesn't break a sweat in beating Lara Croft to a bloddy pulp.







Wrap #4

Maximus and William Wallace fought hard for many moons. Both tried to gain an advantage, but the fight wore on. William's strength and build clashed with Maximus' skill with a blade and his quick wit. In the end, Maximus stood over a bruised and bloddy William Wallace. After the crowd cheers for mercy for Wallace, Emperor Commodus gives Maximus a thumbs up.

In defiance to the Emperor, Maximus swings downward and ends Wallace's life. Maximus leaves the arena, ready for his fight against Commodus.

But before hand, ol' Max decided to spend a little time with the ladies.

Outcome: After a long struggle, Maximus Desimus Meridius emerges victorious.

Black Canary said a buzzsaw arrow was self-indulgent.

I like to think that I’m not a sheep. I don’t like to follow the masses a lot of the time. I don’t always like the heroes that everyone else likes. Hell, a lot of the time I have a predilection towards villains actually. But back to heroes.

When you’re a DC fan, as I am, you’re probably a fan of one of the A-list or top-tier superheroes: Superman, Batman, Green Lantern, The Flash, Wonder Woman, Captain Marvel, etc… But every once in a while you run into someone who’s favorite character is on the B team or second shelf. I’m one of those guys.

Now don’t get me wrong, I think my guy is just as deserving of being on the A team just as much as Supes or The Bat, but most people think of him as an inferior product. Kind of like I-A football fans view I-AA football (screw you, I-AA football is not inferior and has a better system).



So who’s my guy? Green Arrow. Why? Because he’s just a regular guy that’s got a particular skill and is very good at what he does. Say he’s a Robin Hood wannabe or Batman with a bow and I shove my foot up your ass.

So he started off as a blatant rip off of Batman. I’ll admit that, and it’s totally evident (the Arrowmobile?); but he’s evolved past that. He’s found his niche among the “super-powers” of the DC universe, and he provides the perfect voice for the common man on a team that is mostly made up of people who are anything but common. Take the first episode of last season’s Justice League Unlimited. He was recruited to be the voice of the little guy, to help keep the team in line. And who was it that told the narrative in Identity Crisis? That’s right. My man, Oliver.

Come to think of it, I had a cat named Ollie when I was little. He was a badass too. Guess I was destined to be a GA fan. Sorry, alls I’m saying is to give the undercard guys a chance. You’d be surprised at who can actually shine just as bright as the Holy Trinity if they ever step out of the spotlight. I think we’ll see a lot of the second stringers rise to the occasion during Infinite Crisis, and maybe you’ll develop a new favorite too.

D